Redirect

When one finds out, as one is always likely to do, that someone you loved has found someone new--not a someone to distract, not a fling, but a someone who you know must be truly wonderful if they were to be with the loved person--there is really nothing to do but try as calmly as possible to enumerate all of the wonders of the world one can possibly summon to mind in an attempt to stave off heartbreak.

LIST:
1. Carafe
2. "Ces Arbres Sont Dangereux." 'These trees are dangerous' signs nailed to some true beauties in Les Jardins Luxembourg
3. Piles of sawdust where the trees once stood the following day
4. Old woman stooped at 90 degrees walking her long haired dachshund
5. Brass menorahs at the marche des puces
6. The cache behind a grate along Avenue de L'Observatoire where a homeless person has husbanded away a pillow, a blanket, and a book.
7. The taxi driver obeying his prayers on the corner of Rue de la Sante and Blvd Arago...now I know where Mecca is
8. The string orchestra in the Chatelet Metra station
9. The delivery man whistling 'fields of gold' as dawn is breaking over the Pantheon on Rue Sufflot
10. A child's handmade, orange leather shoes
11. Adele's hair after a bath
12. The street musician's on Vavin--tuba, trumpet, and accordion
13. a black top hat with a red feather
14. the birds in the bush that you thought were leaves until the leaves suddenly flew away
15. the skyline of Chicago at night
16. I'm trying
17. I'm trying
18. I'm trying
19. I'm trying
20. I'm trying
21. cobblestones
22. I'm trying
23. I'm trying
24. I'm trying
25. I'm moving ahead
26. Ahead
27. I'm trying
28. I'm trying
29. The Tunisian man in the bike shop
30. warm autumn days
31. I'm trying
32. I'm trying
33. I'm trying
34. I'm trying
35. I'm trying
36. I'm trying
37. plans

I am trying to let this city fill me with beautiful things in the place where you used to be. It's not quite enough. You thought you weren't, but you could have been had you decided to. So far, in terms of empty vs. full, I feel about as one would on a diet of rice cakes. Perhaps this explains why I'm growing thinner. Sometimes, I really hate you.